Saturday, August 11, 2012

Pre-Surgery Housekeeping

Chris will be checked in for his total thyroidectomy at 11:00 am PST on Monday, August 13. The surgery is expected to start at 1:00-1:30 pm PST and take up to 2 1/2 hours. Therefore I will most likely not have the surgeon's report until 4:00 pm PST and possibly much later. Chris will most likely take until late in the evening to wake up fully.

Total thyroidectomy is a standard, common surgery with a risk of death of next to zero. The other risks are:

Permanent damage to the vocal chords: 2%
Permanent damage to the parathyroids (requiring calcium and vitamin D3 supplements for life): 10%
Risk of temporary damage to vocal chords: 10-15%

He will be in the hospital at least overnight and possibly up to 1 week while his calcium levels are stabilized.

As for contacting everyone I will do what I usually do and call the family information hubs. For the Sterns that will be my dad and my aunt Linda, the Minors my uncle Jim, the Byrnes Christy and Caroline, and the Dinmores Chris's aunt Helen. I will also be posting updates to the blog, the forum, Facebook, and our other social sites as soon as I have updates to post.

If you are looking for an update, either call one of the info hubs or check the blog or other sites. I will have limited cell battery and even more limited patience for repeating the same info over and over again. HOWEVER, if you must call or text please call or text me on my cell phone, NOT Chris's cell or the home line.

Chris will take at least one week to recover. During this time he may not be able to talk. Trying to make him talk will result in your death at my hands. Waking him up at any time (and we don't know when he'll be sleeping) will also result in your death at my hands. So please, if you must talk to him, call me first so he can recover in peace.

Insurance is taken care of and preauthorized. The hospital is ready to go. All pre-surgical tests and consults are done. I have a place to stay and people who will make sure I don't go insane. Every irritating little detail up to and including a week worth's of food where the dogs can reach it has been taken care of.

The US has invaded countries with less preparation than we've done for this surgery. Everything is set.

We'll see y'all on the other side.

Mel