The Internet Ate My Brain

So last week I stumbled across googles interview archive on youtube. Lemme 'splain...

So since 2005, Google has hosted about 600 authors, writers, film makers, musicians, and chefs; for one hour talks, lectures, or interviews.

Predictably, it being Google, there's some pretty hard lefty folks up there; but also predictably for Google, there are a bunch of cool SF authors up there, as well as internet culture commentators, humorists etc...

Coincidentally, I've been going through an extended period of severe insomnia; averaging about two hours of sleep a night since a couple day before Christmas.

Predictably, me being me, since I found the full archive I've been watching them one after another. Of course me being me, I'm still reading my 100+ web sites per day, and I've been reading adventure and SF novels with the interviews as background noise.

Yeah, I believe in information overload.

Actually, the one good thing about insomnia, is that it lets me catch up on reading. My current "to read" pile is up over 200 books; and since the day before Christmas, I've managed to reduce that pile by 13 books... Of course also in that time I've received 9 more...

It never ends.

So I thought I'd post up a list of the ones I dig, that way you don't need to dig through all 600 videos. Oh, and some UNC chapel hill interviews are mixed in there, just because they're good.

Here's one of the funniest ones, from the writer of "Stuff White People Like":

and a great one from Neil Gaiman:

Google Interviews:

YouTube - AtGoogleTalks's Channel

YouTube - Authors@Google: Neil Gaiman

YouTube - Authors@Google: Neal Stephenson

YouTube - Authors@Google: Charles Stross

YouTube - Authors@Google: Cory Doctorow

YouTube - Authors@Google: Cory Doctorow

YouTube - Cory Doctorow: Pwned: How Copyright turns us all into IP ser

YouTube - Authors@Google: Randall Munroe

YouTube - Authors@Google: Christian Lander, "Stuff White People Like"

YouTube - Authors@Google: Marco Pierre White

YouTube - Authors@Google: Anthony Bourdain

YouTube - Authors@Google: Mario Batali

YouTube - Authors@Google: James Randi

YouTube - Authors@Google: Steve Wozniak

YouTube - Authors@Google: Stan Lee

YouTube - Authors@Google: Daniel Wilson & Anna Long

YouTube - Authors@Google: Greg Bear

YouTube - Authors@Google: Kyle Cassidy

YouTube - Authors@google: Gary Vaynerchuk

YouTube - Authors@ Google: Joe Haldeman

YouTube - Authors@Google: Bjorn Lomborg

YouTube - Authors@Google: Douglas Engelbart

YouTube - Authors@Google: Steven Levy

YouTube - Authors@Google: Lawrence Lessig

YouTube - Authors@Google: Masaharu Morimoto

YouTube - Authors@Google: Michael Carroll

YouTube - Authors@Google: Robert Frank

YouTube - Authors@Google: James Watson

YouTube - Authors@Google: Jeffrey Kluger

YouTube - Authors@Google: David Michaels

YouTube - Authors@Google: Alex Roy

YouTube - Authors@Google - Chris Anderson

YouTube - Authors@Google: Dan Ariely

YouTube - Authors@Google: Eric Ripert

YouTube - Authors@google: Sam Gosling

Other than the two I embedded above, I particularly recommend Neal Stephenson, Cory Doctorow (all three), Charlie Stross, Randall Munroe (I hope y'all are reading XKCD), Marco Pierre White, and Anthony Bourdain.

The Woz one is amazing, but the audio and video quality are crap. It's worth it if you're into that geek history thing, but it might irritate you too much.

Anyway, I know my audience, y'all are probably going to waste as much time as I have... or at least proportionally.

A Slightly Startling Realization

A fair bit of the clothing that I bought new and still own, would now be considered "vintage".

The oldest piece of clothing I still have is old enough to vote, and in a year or so will be old enough to drink.

Technically speaking I don't use it anymore; because my wife has expropriated it from me, calling it the most comfortable thing she's ever worn.

Then there's all the old band and pop culture logo t-shirts I own, that if I were pale and skinny with scrubby facial hair would be considered "ironically hip"...

...but as I'm pale, fat, and neatly groomed (well... if I've remembered to shave this morning); I'm just getting old and never throw shit out.

Personal Updates

Mels brother is out of the ICU. Stable, with his blood pressure down to the 140/80 range, back up to 20% kidney function, and down to one dialysis session per day.

He was admitted last Thursday, and moved to the ICU Friday, with a hypertensive emergency, renal failure, and pericarditis. The proper medication, and a pericardial stent to drain the fluid moved his heart out of danger; and they've been focusing on his kidney function since.

It looks like he may end up with a kidney transplant. He's been on the list for years, but they're apparently moving him up because of this.

Meanwhile, my mothers emergency housing assistance ran out, and she still refuses to move in with us. She was supposed to have completed her paperwork to move to long term housing assistance several weeks ago; but being my mother, she didn't. Mel has been running her around from SSI to DES, to every other bureaucracy trying to get things sorted out.

Technically speaking, she should have been on disability since 2003; but they kept denying her (their policy seems to be "everybody is lying about disability so we'll just deny everyone until they either give up or sue"). Now, in order to get housing assistance she needs to get the disability sorted out.

The good news is, once she does (and it's approved), six to eight weeks from now), she'll be getting $900 a month in housing assistance, $940 a month in direct disability payments, $400 a month in food aid, medicare/aid, and state medical (called ACCHS or "access" here) and prescription coverage; which is equivalent to another $2500 a month or so out of pocket.

Not that I'm enthused about my mother taking the equivalent of a $60,000 a year income from the government; but that's the system.

This by the way is part of what we've been floating her every few months until we cut her off last year. That, and the legal bills, have kept us in a pretty poor financial situation; and the ongoing legal bills (we owe $17,500, and expect another $20,000 to come) will continue to do so at least through 2009.

But we're all alive, and reasonably well, and reasonably happy, and together; and that counts for a hell of a lot.

Not my first rodeo

Thankfully, I have a very good, very secure job.

I just assume they are, and act accordingly

I just have to say...

Holy Christ, it's 2009...

Where did the decade go?

If you'd asked me January first 1989 if I would still be on this earth (instead of in it) on January first 2009, I'd have given 50/50 odds (less if you'd asked me in 1994).

1989 is officially "a long time ago", now, at 20 years. Hell, there were people voting this past election who weren't even alive then.

After 10 years, the soviets left afghanistan; but we were still cleaning up the mess Carter left in Iran in '79 shooting down two Iranian fighters in the gulf of Sidra. Oh, and Khomeni orders the death of Salman Rushdie for writing nasty things about that pedophile Muhammad. At least he died a few months later.

The single most important even of '89 though? The Berlin wall came down. My god... 45 years under the communists, and finally in November, they tore it down. The cracks in the communists facade grow too wide to ignore, as Hungary dismantles it's border walls, Solidarity is legalized in poland and wins control of government, Czechoslovakia, Bulgaria, and Romania follow suit and a chinese student stops a column of tanks by force of will alone.

George Bush becomes president, and some nutbag kills 5 kids with a Chinese AK copy in Stockton California, prompting Bush to ban their importation.... Yeah, that worked, really it did.

Batman, Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade, and Lethal Weapon 2 were the top movies of the year (funny that sequels to two of those would be the top movies of 2008 isn't it). My favorite movie of the year, Heathers, didn't even make the chart.

Oh, and the Simpsons get their own show. Yes, it's been 20 years.

In Music, it was a bad year for the charts, dominated by Debbie Gibson, Janet Jackson, Paula Abdul, and Milli Vanilli... the only bright spot being Aerosmith.

It was however, a good year for albums: The Offspring, The Bosstones, Mr. Big (don't laugh, they kick ass. Billy Sheehan is amazing) and Dream Theater released their first album; Dylan and the Dead came out, De La Soul had "Three feet high and rising", The Pixies released "Doolittle", Tom Petty dropped "Full Moon Fever " (which I still think is his best album), Faith No More released "The Real Thing", The Beastie Boys had "Pauls Boutique", Nine Inch Nails released "Pretty Hate Machine", Satriani had "Flying in a blue dream" and Aerosmith crushed the world with "Pump" (it was their best selling release to date, went 7x platinum, was the fourth best selling album of the year, and earned them a Grammy).

I'm not even going to note the achievments of those born in '89 yet. Not to say they haven't had ANY, but they are few, and mostly in the field of pop music.

It was a bad year for those we lost however: Salvador Dali, John Cassavetes, Lucille Ball, Gilda Radner, Jim Backus, Mel Blanc, Lawrence Olivier, Irving Berlin, Bette Davis, Graham Chapman, Vladimir Horowitz, all passed in '89.

Remember back to the future, in 1985; when he went back to 1955... yeah, that's 1979 to right now...

1979 is practically ancient by todays standards, but I remember Reagan campaign commercials. It doesn't feel that long ago... but by anyones standards, it was a bad year.

In '79 Iran fell to religious dictatorship... and we helped. Then our own people were taken hostage, and we did... not very much (though it was not for lack of trying; it was for lack of political will). The Russians invaded afghanistan, and inresponse we armed the islamic fanatics opposing them. Meanwhile, Britain grows a spine, and sends Margaret thatcher to number 10.

John Wayne, Charlie Mingus, Arthur Fiedler, Sid Vicious, and Lester Flatt all died... Those born that year... well let's just say it was an imbalance (though maybe we should count Sid on the positive side of things).

Pop culture ws at it's very lowest ebb. Kramer vs. Kramer was not only the number one movie, it was an Oscar sweep too. Disco ruled with every number 1 album and single of the year; and five of the top ten songs being from the Bee Gees or Donna Summer.

At least punk and new wave were doing cool things, with Madness, and The Pretenders first albums, The Clash dropping "London Calling", the talking heads, the Cars, the Police, The Tubes, the Ramones, The Undertones, Stiff Little Fingers, and Elvis Costello all doing interesting things. Metal (and hard rock) had its moments too, with Motorhead releasing 3 albums, AC/DC with "Highway to Hell", Diamond Heads "Lightning to the Nations", a live album and the hell bent for leather tour from Judas Priest, and the first demos from Iron Maiden.

The one real highlight to break into the mainstream was Pink Floyds "The Wall".

Woodstock, and the moon landing? 40 years ago this year. So if you went to Woodstock, you're gonna be pushing sixty at best; and hurricane Camille killed 250 people while you were partying and didn't notice.

Led Zeppelin released their first album, the Beatles broke up; Richard Nixon became president, and Eisenhower died. The 747, the Concorde, Internet Packets, UNIX, and Monty Pythons Circus first flew.

I'm not even going to get into the number of pop culture icons of today born in '69... let's just say that mid '68 to early '69 must've been a good 9 months for pretty people to breed.

Boris Karloff, Judy Garland, and Brian Jones passed, and the world was lessened. Allen Dulles, Ho Chi Minh, Joe Kennedy, Jack Keruac, and Walter Gropius died, and the world was made a better place. Ted Kennedy killed a woman and was allowed to sit in the Senate with no reprecussions.

The day the music died was 50 years ago this year. Hawaii and Alaska joined the union. Cypress and Singapore became independent nations; and Cuba fell under communist dictatorship. The first seven astronauts were selected for Mercury.

Raymond Chandler, Frank Lloyd Wright, Preston Sturges, Mario Lanza, Erroll Flynn, Blind Willie McTell, and Billy Holiday all passed on.

On a personal "makes me feel old" note; Perry Farrel, Brian Setzer, Robert Smith, Morrissey, John Linnell (Flansburgh is next year), Richie Sambora, Joe Elliot, Weird Al, and Rebecca DeMornay (damn... Risky Business... just damn) will be fifty this year.

All this, and I just have to say: Where are my damn flying cars?

The weird thing about Arizona

A couple days ago, the temperature dipped down into the low 30's; and I thought maybe we might actually have a late fall/ early spring (we never actually have winter here).

In a little under ten and a half hours, it will be January 2009; and right now it's 74, bright and sunny out, and I have a very confused bee buzzing around my head.

The low tonight should hit somewhere around 45.

The Most Basic of Differing First Principles

Yesterday during a conversation with Chris's mother, I came to a most unexpected realization.

She rattled on about some reality show she watched that showed real ER doctors in real situations, and how disappointed she was that these doctors didn't "do" more.

Mel: "What do you mean?"
Jane: "All they do is hand off patients to other doctors in other areas."
Mel: "And? That's their job. Take care of emergencies and send patients to the specialists best able to deal with the problem."
Jane: "But I thought they were gods. I thought they could handle everything, and knew everything."
Mel: "That's impossible."
Jane: "But that's the way its supposed to be."
Mel: "No, that's the way you think it's supposed to be."
Jane: "But aren't they supposed to know everything?"
Mel: "No, they can't. It's something of a minor miracle that they know enough to help at all, and there's still huge gaps in scientific knowledge."

And that's when it hit me. She and I were coming from completely differing first principles. She wanted everything to be perfect, where sickness was "something wrong" and if only the doctors put their unlimited knowledge to the problem, they could fix it. I was coming from the first principle that shit happens, the world is chaotic, and when the doctors could do something, it was because of a combination of medical knowledge and medical progress made over thousands of years.

Then I realized Og was having the exact same problem in his anarchy discussions. In fact, Jane's position and Billy Beck's position could be summed up as

The world is perfect. People are perfect. If we could just keep from messing things up, everything would stay perfect.

If we could keep from getting sick, things would be perfect. If we just didn't mess with other people and kept our own boundaries, we wouldn't need government because everything would be perfect.

If only evil man would stop polluting the planet and save the polar bears, everything would be BACK to perfect.

This entire principle assumes that there is such a thing as "perfect".

My position, however, and Og's position could be summed up as

The world is chaotic and shit happens. Nothing is intrinsically perfect. Deal with it.

Humans are prone to sickness, and the only thing that keeps up from dying is concerted effort on our part, and the accumulation of medical progress as applied by those who have studied the work of those before them. People are flawed, and a very few people would make life hell for the vast majority without some sort of outside interference. The world is constantly changing, and adapting, and all life must change with it. All order in this world is a direct consequence of seeing what works (i.e. living and surviving), noticing what doesn't work (death) and diligently replicating what works (i.e. adaptation).

These are the most basic of first principles. One can either assume the world is perfect and everything wrong is due to destruction of the perfect, or can assume that the world is flawed to begin with everything good is due to hard work, observation, and diligence in the War Against Entropy.

Where do you stand?

Mel

Cross-posted at Mrs. Anarchangel

Best "Modern" battle scenes

In my post on "The Lord of the Rings" the other day, I said:

I still think that the battle for Helms Deep is the best pre-modern battle scene ever put to film (the modern battle king is of course the opening of "Saving Private Ryan").

A reader, SS, respectfully disagrees:

Your main point here is LOR, but I take exception to your drive by comment that the best modern day combat scene is the opening of Saving Private Ryan.

Although good, it is by no means great.

At a minimum the true to life seizure of the field artillery battery during D-Day by E Co, 101st Airborne at Brecourt, in Band of Brothers is superior.

A. It is historically accurate, and actually happened, whereas Spielberg's depiction is a scene of chaos.

B. Although these actions almost certainly happened on Omaha Beach, it is as unlikely as the rest of Hollywood plot of SPR, that these events all happened to the Rangers at Point du Hoc.

C. Although I am no fan of Spielberg for his position on the 2nd Amendment, feel Dale Dye is over rated as a historical consultant, and there has been some recent controversy over Ambrose's work, in sum the wide lens of Band of Brothers at least tries to be accurate.

D. As to the scene itself, close in hand camera jerkiness should not be confused for depicting the "Fog of War" or the "View from the Trenches". This is a Spielberg trademark in his later works and the low camera angle lacks depth.

Again this is Hollywood focusing on the unfamiliar and not the routine. IMHO this is a trite contrivance.

It is the FUBAR that is routine and Courage that is uncommon. Please, irrespective of Hollywood, I have the utmost respect for the 2nd Ranger Bn, 5th Ranger Bn, and the 101st Airborne Div (506 PLR)."

This was my response:

SS. actually I agree that in general, Band of Brothers is superior to "Private Ryan". I just re-watched both scenes on DVD, and still feel the "Ryan" scene is the better modern battle scene by far; because of its scope, scale, and impact.

Yes, BoB was more accurate; but it was far "smaller". The scene depicted (in fact almost every scene from BoB, as well as most scenes other than the opener for Ryan) is a small unit action; whereas the Ryan opener captures at least some sense of the immense scale of the Omaha beach landing.

I felt like expanding that however; one because a comment response doesn't really cover it, and two, because this is a very interesting subject.

I should note that I was referring very specifically to the opening 24 minutes, portraying the landing at Omaha beach (as it happens, and not at all relevant to the quality thereof; some friends of mine are in that scene. The Irish Army made up the bulk of the soldiers; including some of my drinking and football mates).

Although the battle at the radar installation, and the push through St. Mer Eglise were good; they don't approach the opening sequence at all; and there are better scenes (in fact better scenes depicting the same events) in other movies.

In the Omaha beach scene, yes, the handheld camera action can be jerky and distracting; but it also represents the viewpoint of an individual soldier quite well. The scope and sweep of the thing is just crushing. The sound design is the best I've ever heard for ANY scene of any kind. The cinematography is perfect....

To my mind, there is no better single modern battle scene ever put to film.

At any rate, I thought I'd list my top five modern battle scenes here, and ask you for yours (I define modern in this case as post civil war, and not set in the future):

1. "Saving Private Ryan", Omaha beach landing
2. "Band of Brothers", artillery seizure at Brecourt
3. "We Were Soldiers", siege of IA Drang valley (admittedly, this is most of the movie, not just a single scene).
4. "Zulu", the battle for Rorkes drift (also my favorite Michael Caine performance)
5. "Tora Tora Tora", the bombing of Pearl Harbor

There are a lot of others that I could have put on this list. The airborne assault from "A Bridge Too Far" for example; or the landing in "the longest day".

Actually, five years after I first watched it, and at least two years after I last watched it, the battle for Bastogne from "Band of Brothers" still sticks with me; much more than Brecourt.

Then there's the river crossing in "Enemy at the Gates".

I can't watch Gordon and Shugart defending Super 64 in "Blackhawk down" without crying. No exaggeration; in fact just thinking about it now and I'm tearing up.

Speaking of tearing up; knowing about Rorkes Drift, and about Rick Rescorla (Ia Drang, and 9/11 both); I can't listen to this song without doing so:

Oh and when the hell is someone going to make a movie about Operation Hump? Yes I realize Viet Nam movies are unfashionable, but that's a story that should be told on film.

I LOVE the air cav assault on the beach in Apocalypse now; but it's not exactly a great battle scene... more of a crowning moment of awesomeness.

The battle for Hue city in Full Metal Jacket is a crusher. Sure it's all drama no accuracy; it's still amazing.

I could go on for hours. In fact I don't know if I can really make that list a "top five" or even a top 50, because some of these scenes are so different it's hard to compare them to each other.

So, what are your favorites?

"Will no one rid me of this meddlesome priest?"

838 years ago, Reginald FitzUrse, Hugh de Moreville, William de Tracy, and Richard le Breton did; based on an offhand annoyed utterance by an absolute monarch.

Coincidentally, precisely 767 years later; the Irish (or rather 26/32nds of them) finally freed themselves of those meddlesome kings (though the process was significantly more difficult than that of the four knights, and poor Fr. Beckett).

Amazing Interview with George Carlin

Actually, it's an amazing series of interviews with many great actors, comedians, producers and other "television legends"; but Carlin is the gateway drug so to speak.

Unfortunately, they've disabled embedding for part 1, but I can link directly to it. I will however embed part 2 and 3 (combined):

The 12 Hours of the Rings

So Mel and I did something we've been meaning to do for some time; but haven't had a chance to, since it takes a good 12 hours uninterrupted.

We watched the entirety of the extended editions of the Lord of the Rings trilogy back to back; only breaking between films for a meal, a snack, and to use the facilities.

I have a few comments to make on the experience.

First, it was in no way boring or tedious. They really are great films, of a wonderful world and a wonderful story. I don't see how anyone could be bored by that.

However...

Peter Jackson does not know how to end a movie.

At all.

It's even worse in the extended editions.

Especially "The Return of the King"; which has four endings, all of them bad.

I still think the Return of the King was the weakest of the three; mostly because of the ending(s); but also because of the battle of Pelennor fields.

Both "Two Towers" and "Return of the King" suffer in the extended cuts from the interminable Sam and Frodo sequences.

In that vein, Peter Jackson really has some unresolved repressed homosexuality issues to work through.

I still think that the battle for Helms Deep is the best pre-modern battle scene ever put to film (the modern battle king is of course the opening of "Saving Private Ryan").

I really dislike the battle of Pelennor fields, and the siege of Minas Tirath; with an excessive and unnecessary use of non-canon deus ex machina (the armys of the dead). The only good parts of that whole sequence are Eowyn killing the witch king; and the Olyphant charge.

The extended versions are far better films in most every way; though there are some things which he should have cut. Some scenes either don't work, or just go on too long.

The way to watch them really is one after the other. I of course saw them one at a time as they came out; and had not done the marathon since; and it greatly improves the narrative and feel of the thing. The films were written, shot, and edited as one film; and only cut up for release... funnily enough much as "The Lord of the Rings" was written as a single book and split in three for publication... and the best way to enjoy the story is all in one.

The extended version has much better characterization and story arcs for Boromir, and Faramir. The theatrical cuts of the films I thought butchered them both. Also Sean Bean was great (as always), and in the extended edition David Wenham really shines; something he couldn't do with the nothing role the theatrical cut reduced Faramir to.

Frodo is simply poorly characterized throughout; more pathetic melodrama than character, and this is worsened in the extended edition. Sam (as is appropriate to the hobbits arc) is the true hero of the piece, more so than anyone else; and again this is very much emphasized in the extended edition.

Similarly, Gimli is still weak comic relief; an insult to a wonderful character (though I do enjoy Johnathan Rhys-Davies performance of him).

Orlando Bloom can't act, but that's OK because Legolas as written doesn't require any acting ability.

Liv Tyler also can't act; but Arwen as written (in the movie, not the book) actually needs some acting ability, and her lack thereof leaves the character as hollow. Again, this is much worse in the extended edition.

Eowyn was much better in the extended edition; unfortunately Eomer was still nothing.

Andy Sirkis was robbed when the academy disqualified him for an oscar nomination because his characterization was motion captured then animated over. That was Sirkis's performance, not the animators, and he deserved a best supporting actor nomination at least.

You can't bitch about the Balrog, because Tolkien himself had multiple descriptions for them, including one like that used in the movie. Besides which, the Balrog in the movie was pretty cool.

No, I don't miss Tom Bombadil, or the Scouring of the Shire; I think the movies are better without them (though you have to see the extended versions or leaving out the scouring makes no sense), ... and in fact the book would have been as well.

I hate adaptation purity nazis.

Man and Wife

As of 5 o'clock this afternoon, Mel and I are legally man and wife.

For those who don't know, Mel and I had a commitment marriage (a private ceremony) three years ago; but were unable to get legally married because of her ex in Canada drawing out her divorce to a ridiculous degree.

The final divorce decree came down a few weeks ago (unfortunately we are still battling over custody), and we decided to get legally married as soon as we could conveniently do so.

Understand that Mel and I have considered ourselves married since we swore our oaths three years ago; but the legal acknowledgment of our marriage is important for many reasons (legal, social, personal).

The day after Christmas just seemed like a good time. My grandparents were married on New Years day, we're legally married the day after Christmas... an eventful time of year.

So, this afternoon we swore before god, our friends Kristina and John, and the state of Arizona (in the person of Justice of the Peace C. Steven McMurry) to love, honor, and cherish each other from this day until the ends of our lives.

McMurry is a short, stout, red headed and curly haired Irishman; with portraits of Kennedy and Reagan up on the wall (as he said, "the two Irish presidents"); and a laugh, a smile, and a real love for his job.

It's funny, but I thought of what my grandfather would think, me being married by a redheaded Irish judge (as he was, 55 years ago)... I think he would have loved it.

McMurry conducted a truly beautiful ceremony. In fact, if you choose to have a civil marriage in Arizona, I would seriously encourage you to seek out his services as officiant.

After the ceremony, we had a celebration dinner at the newly opened Fogo de Chao in Scottsdale; eating our favorite type of special occasion meal, Churrascaria (Hmmm, meat... lots and lots of meat).

I kind of like things this way. Quiet, just a couple of friends, in the most wonderful time of the year (and no, I don't mean that in any kind of funny or ironic way). It just feels right.

We're still going to have a catholic wedding when Mels' annulment comes through; but that will take up to two and a half years (18 months is the minimum). We'll be doing the big wedding thing then (well, we're going to try to keep it small, but still more than a few guests); but I'm more happy than I can tell you, to be legal married today.

Prayers Tonight

Mels brother Tim moved to Dallas a few months ago. Tim has chronic kidney disease (technically IgA nephropathy), as a result of an infection inducing acute renal failure 10 years ago; which has left him with about 40% function of his kidneys.

Since he's moved to Dallas, he's had a problem receiving proper treatment. Tim has atypical drug reactions, and it took him and his doctors years to understand what worked for him and what didn't.

Unfortunately, many doctors seem to believe that their pronouncements are infallible dictats from god, subject to no disagreement, or even the actual reality of the patient in front of them. Thus, his nephrologist in Dallas has decided that it's not that the treatments are wrong, it's that Tim is not complying with instructions.

Tim is many things, some good some not; but what he most definitely is, is absolutely anal about following his treatment regimen.

It was NOT following proper treatment that killed his kidneys in the first place; and only through diligent adherence to his regimen did he not only survive, but improve his kidney function from around 20% to around 40%.

Yesterday, Tim went to the emergency room in Dallas with his blood pressure spiking to 200/120. Elevated blood pressure is one of many side effects of Tims treatment regimen; but that is dangerously high.

While there, his nephrologist insisted that the reason Tims blood pressure was through the roof, was because he was non-compliant, and that he didn't need any other treatment but to get back on his regimen.

Tim fired his nephrologist in Dallas yesterday and got on a plane this afternoon.

This was mostly because he is a stubborn idiot. I'm sure he can find a good nephrologist in Dallas, and flying with his blood pressure like that is dangerous and stupid... but he's here.

Mel picked him up about three hours ago, and they went straight to the hospital where he's been recieving treatment for years.

He was just admitted with a hypertensive emergency. It's a recurrence of acute renal failure, complicated by acute hypertension; with his blood pressure at 245/145.

The conventional treatment (SNP and Clonidine) isn't bringing his blood pressure down, and they're worried about trying anything else because of his atypical reactions, and his kidneys .

Because his BP is so high, they have to worry about ischemia, and because of his severely reduced kidney function they have to be VERY careful about what drugs to administer(captopril for example, another typical emergency hypertension treatment, could kill him). They're starting him on a slow Labetalol IV to try and bring his BP down over about 8 hours.

His old nephrologist will be seeing him in the morning.

Merry Christmas

Probably won't be posting anything 'til Monday. May god bless you and keep you, and you families and friends.

The Saw Stop in Action

The SawStop is a great system. Really, it would be wonderful if it was widely available on every saw. Unfortunately, the owner of the technology won't license it to anyone for less than extorionate rates (as in doubling the cost of a table saw.

Ok, every inventor has the right to make money of their invention, and I wouldn't begrudge the man that, but for one thing: Hee's lobbying congress, and the CPSC (consumer products safety comission) to make SawStop mandatory on all tablesaws in the U.S.

Sorry buddy, it won't fly for the microstamping scumbags either.

The system works, very well in fact; though not with all saw blades (the blade has to be within a certain range of inductance). In fact, sometimesit works a bit too well, in that some woods with resinous saps; and wet wood; will set it off too.

Ooops.

Oh and when it goes off, the saw has to be rebuilt at the cost of from $80 to $300; plus the cost of the blade (and premium saw blades can be very expensive).

Truly, he is "The One"

One of the most amazing photographs I've ever seen

From Boston.com (click to enlarge):

Dunkin Donuts Christmas Blend

Yeah.... no.

If I'd wanted an amaretto cookie, I'd have asked for one.

Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 28 - The Nog Abides

Ahhh, it's that time of year again; when families gather round, exchange gifts and insults, and get royally crocked in front of the tree...

And what holiday season would be complete without our alcoholic eggy friend, Egg Nog.

Not mine, I'll tell you that much.

Much is made of families secret Nog recipes; and how difficult it is to make good Nog.

Hooey.

Egg Nog is EASY; at least in these days of powered hand mixers.

Gather round children and take a listen from old Chris.

Ingredients:

2 quarts whole milk
1 quart heavy cream
8 large or jumbo eggs (or the equivalent thereof)
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup granulated white sugar (vanilla sugar preferred)
1-2 cups butterscotch schnapps, aged or spiced rum, brandy, or bourbon (to taste)
1/2 cup pure vanilla extract (yes, really, a full 4oz... or 4 large vanilla beans, scraped then steeped in the cream overnight
2 tblsp ground REAL cinnamon (not cassia. Cassia will get gummy and bitter. To taste... I use a lot more personally)
1 tblsp FRESH ground nutmeg (use a microplane. Jarred nutmeg is awful stuff. Again, to taste... Fresh is much stronger than jarred).

Preparation:
The only real "secret", if it can be said to be a secret at all, is in the preparation.

First things first, you want all your liquid ingredients to be as cold as you can. They'll whip up better, and be more refreshing.

Now, take you 8 eggs, crack them into a large mixing bowl, and beat them until they increase in volume by 50% or so.

Next, slowly beat in the two cups of sugar. This should effectively double the volume of the eggs.

While still beating, add the vanilla, cinnamon, and nutmeg. Remember, use fresh here. The jarred powdered stuff is awful.

One caveat; make sure you add the nutmeg and cinnamon in a bit at a time and that it's to your taste. Nutmeg is pretty bitter stuff and some people don't care for more than a touch. Of course since you're adding it in at this stage, the flavor will be stronger in the egg base than in the final mix with the dream and milk.

If you want to get really fancy you can scald the cream with two fresh vanilla beans (seeded and with the seeds in the cream) in it instead of using extract; but you have to do that far enough in advance to allow the cream to cool.

Now whip the cream to a light foam in another large bowl, but not to whipped cream texture. You want to get it light and frothy, not stiff; and then slowly beat the egg mixture in.

Finally, while still beating, mix in your alcohol. Even if you aren't a drinker, you should include SOME alcohol in your nog, because of how it interacts with the flavoring oils and aromatics; and with the milk and egg proteins (though the alcohol in some vanilla extracts could be enough).

A sweet alcohol with a "warm" flavor characterisitic is best here. I personally like butterscotch schnapps.

So, what you have now is effectively egg nog base. Technically speaking, it's a raw custard. As such, you can make up large batches and keep it around refrigerated for about a week. It's also a pretty good base for a custard sauce, or a custard ice cream. It's a bit too thick for drinking however.

When you're ready to drink your Nog, what you want to do is whip up your nog base again to aerate it, then whip in approximately as much whole milk as nog base... maybe a bit less depending on how thick you like your Nog.

Serve cold, with a dusting of cinnamon and nutmeg over the top; or for a bit of extra flair, a float of warm liquor (slowly pour a half measure of a thick warmed liquor - like a rum, not something thinner or astringent - over the back of a spoon held over the top of the nog). Even better, make it a float of hot buttered rum.

How many does this serve? Well, I suppose it depends on how much Nog you like now doesn't it? Depending on how much you whip, the mix above will make about 5 quarts.

Update:

Reader Ted says: "You said it was easy, not that it didn't have calories. Wow. Sounds really good, though."

It is Ted, and it does... have calories that is, lots of them. unlike most of my recipes however, it uses discrete amounts of well known ingredients, so it's relatively easy to calculate the approximate calorie count. Also, Rumpshot asked for a carbohydrate count, and I'll throw that in too.

Perhaps it's against the ethos of the "Recipes for REAL men" to count calories... but I don't think so. In fact, the real ethos is in knowing how many calories are in it, and eating (or in this case drinking) it anyway.

So, lets see what we've got:

64oz milk - 20cal, 1.4gr carbs per oz - 1280cal, 89,6gr carbs
32oz cream - 110cal, .8gr carbs per oz - 3520cal, 25.6gr carbs
16oz sugar - 100cal, 28.4gr carbs per oz - 1600cal, 454.4gr carbs
8oz schnapps - 100cal, 7.3gr carbs per oz - 800cal, 58.4gr carbs
8 eggs - 90cal, 1gr carbs per egg - 720cal, 8gr carbs

Total - 7920cal, 636gr carbs
Volume - approximately 160oz
Calories and carbs - approximately 50 calories, and 4gr of carbs per ounce

So a single 16oz glass of Nog would be about 800 calories, and 64gr carbs.

For comparison, a 20oz imperial pint of Guinness runs about 220 calories.

Funny day when the Guinness is four times "healthier" a beverage eh?

And be sure to check out:
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 27 - That's too turducken hard
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 26 - Hot Smoke
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 25 - That's a Spicy Polpette
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 24 - It's Meat, in Loaf Form
Recipes for REAL Women, Volume 23 - Some Like it Hot
Recipes for REAL Women, Volume 22 - Full Fat, Full Dairy, All Killer, No Filler
Recipes for REAL Women, Volume 21 - Forget About the Dough Boy
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 20 - QDCBS (Quick and Dirty Chili Bean Stew)
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 19 - Chicken Salmonella
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 18 - I'll give YOU a good stuffing turkey (1)
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 17 - REAL Coffee
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 16 - DTG (Damn That's Good) dip
Recipes for REAL Women, Volume 15 - More Chocolate Than Cookie
Recipes for REAL Women, Volume 14 - Millions of Peaches
Recipes for REAL Women, Volume 13 - Mels 10,000 Calorie Butter Cookies
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 12 - Lard Ass Wings
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 11 - Bacon Double Macaroni and Cheese
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 10 - It's the meat stupid
Recipes for REAL Men, Volume 9 - Labor Day Potatos
Recipes for REAL men, Volume 8 - It's a pork fat thing
Recipes for REAL men, Volume 7 - It may not be Kosher...
Recipes for REAL men, Volume 6 - Andouille Guiness Chili
Recipes for REAL men, Volume 5 - Eazza the Ultimate Pizza
Recipes for REAL men, Volume 4 - Two Pound Meat Sauce
Recipes for REAL men, Volume 3 - Highbrow Hash
Recipes for REAL men, Volume 2 - MuscleCarbonara
Recipes for REAL men, Volume 1 - More Beef than Stew