Monday, June 09, 2008

A long week

Much of last week was spent making arrangements, and just coping. We're all exhausted... just wrung out really.

Mels dad decided that he wanted to keep some life around him, so our girls have been staying with him since the night Kathi passed; and they'll be there 'til Friday. Mels brother Mark, and his 4 kids (including a 7 week old) are with him too, so he's absolutely surrounded by reminders of why we put up with all the troubles that come.

Kathi is going to be cremated, and that won't be for another week or so; so there won't be a funeral. Instead, we had a memorial celebration at her church yesterday; a potlatch lunch, followed by testimonials, hymns, and a lovely sermon by their pastor, who was a great friend to Kathi (and of course still is to Roger).

I ended up playing videographer and photographer; which seems kind of odd to me, recording a memorial service; but that's what they wanted, so hey, who am I to say no.

Mel is doing OK. She's never had to deal with this before, so she doesn't really know what to expect; and you can't just tell someone what it's like, and have them know inside... but she's getting by, and we're supporting each other. Thank god for those cose personal relationships; I can't imagine having to lose a parent, and being alone with it.

And now... well, as soon as we get some sleep... the great cleanup begins. Cleanup the house here, and Rogers house. Cleanup all of Kathis stuff. Trips to goodwill and craigslist and ebay...

In some ways, it's amazing how much physical evidence our lives leave behind; but when you think about it, it's far more amazing how little.

The back of a truck seems like such a small space for the remnants of 61 years of living... but of course the real remainder is what lives on in the people whose lives we've touched; not what we pack away in boxes.