Saturday, February 04, 2006

I am Gilettes Bitch



Speaking as someone who even gets razorbumps from a properly pre-oiled, post balmed, extra hot in the shower shave with a mach 3 power nitro (yeah they might as well just call it the TestostoBlade - Shit I've even shaved using astroglide), razors suck.

What's this here? Is it a new sex toy? Perhaps some strange piece of Japanese fetish gear?

No, in fact it is a razor.

In particular it's the new gilette moneymaking scam, the power fusion. It's expensive, it's ugly, it's more than a bit ridiculous... hell you might as well just be mounting a few dozenblades on the wall and rubbing up against them.

Unfortunately, the damn thing works. In fact, the new power fusion kicks ass.

No razorbumps.

None.

Just as a test, I shaved dry; and there was no irritation.

I haven't tried the "built in beard trimmer on the back of the blade" because 1. I like my face and 2. I have an actual nice beard and moustache trimmer to keep neat with.

Of course at 3+ bucks a blade is it worth it (considering you MIGHT get a week out of a blade)?

Is it worth the faintly shameful feeling of putting something that ridiculously self parodic to your face? Worse, is it worth it knowing that you are Gilettes bitch.

Yes, yes it is. All that and more. No seriously it is the best shave you will ever have short of the worlds most perfectly honed straight razor.

Unless you have the aforementioend cuthroat or sharpness, go and buy one of these badboys.